The first half of our life is about accumulation.
Friends, roles, identities, experiences, STUFF…In our youth, we are willing to try lots of new things in search of that “perfect” or “right” thing. It’s a game of trial and error. After all, how are we supposed to know what “sparks joy” for us when we’re still in the process figuring out WHO we are. It’s been my observation as a professional organizer that amidst all of this trial and error, we often drag the artifacts of our failed experiments along with us:
That lip shade that just didn’t look right on you.
Mom and dad’s old dining set that you never really loved in the first place, but it did the job.
Those high waisted jeans you kept trying to make work, but send to the rejection pile each time you try them on.
The boxes of unopened craft supplies that look so magical on the shelves in the store, but felt more like a headache when you think about using them at home.
The guitar you bought after deciding you were FINALLY going to learn how to play! But now every time you look at it you feel guilt about not making the time to practice.
We are willing to bring masses of stuff into our lives because oftentimes, we just don’t know exactly what we want until we try something. It’s the same reason we date around when we’re young, and the same reason you may grow apart from someone you were head-over-hells with a year prior. It takes going through these trials and growing as a person to determine what is truly essential to you.
This leads to the second part of our lives, which is all about editing.
There comes a point when you realize you have the ability to edit every single part of your life. The people you hang around, that tasks that you dread doing, the job that drains your energy, and yes, especially your wardrobe and the items you keep around you at home. (The latter is often the easiest place to start, and a catalyst for editing other areas of your life.)
This is an empowering notion- to take responsibility for EVERY aspect of your life. Admitting that you do have a choice in every matter allows you to actually MAKE these choices; rather than going along with the status quo. You get to be intentional with your life.
Take a look at the things around you. If they’re not representing the YOU you aspire to be, you have the ability to cut the cord, opening the space for the things that ARE you. Leaving only the things essential to your happiness. I’m not saying it will be painless to cut ties with some of these things; especially if they involve relationships or something that you ONCE loved. But remember this: the first step towards getting what you want, is having the courage to get rid of what you don’t. You can’t move forward if you’re constantly reminded of your past.
It’s a natural progression- to move from accumulating to editing. It’s a process of becoming clear about what you want, what you like and who you are.
A cluttered closet or house does not indicate that you are scattered, indecisive and lazy. It may mean you just haven’t updated your space to become aligned with the person you are today.
There’s nothing wrong with the trials and artifacts of previous identities, hobbies and relationships…It only becomes a problem when it keeps you from fully immersing yourself in the present; distracting you from the person you are and want to become.